The ways in which men and women are different are myriad. We don't think alike, feel alike, look alike, see the world in the same way, or enjoy the same kinds of entertainment.

This is most obvious when your wife cries her way through "Les Miserables" for the fourth time, or you force her to sit though a RiverDogs game just because you might catch another foul ball to add to your collection.

But despite the obvious psychological and physiological differences, most males and females manage to get along long enough to re-create, procreate, and generate more little people just like us.

It's been going on for eons. But not until 1980 A.D. did we finally come up with the most significant separation between the sexes -- "Caddyshack."

Cinderella story

Men, being made of snips and snails and puppy dog tails, think this outrageous offering about an exclusive golf course being invaded by a brash new member and a destructive dancing gopher is the funniest movie ever made.

Women, being made of sugar and spice and everything nice, think we're nuts.

Thus we have the Continental Divide of matrimony.

Every time "Caddyshack" appears on the screen, men are glued to it like it's the Meaning of Life wrapped in the Holy Grail.

We sit on the couch and roll in hysteric laughter as Bill Murray, Chevy Chase, Rodney Dangerfield, and Ted Knight ad lib their way through a piece of cinematic magic unlike anything previously produced for our adolescent enjoyment.

"Correct me if I'm wrong, Sandy, but if I kill all the golfers they're going to lock me up and throw away the key."

"You're rather attractive, for a beautiful girl with a great body."

"Cinderella story. Outta nowhere. A former greenskeeper, about to become the next Masters champion. It's in the hole! It's in the hole!"

Eye rolling

All of which makes no sense to women.

While we're breaking each other up with one-liners from Carl Spackler (Bill Murray) and Ty Webb (Chevy Chase), our significant others are rolling their eyes and wondering why they inhabit the same space with such ignorant aliens.

Truth is, we're not Neanderthals, officially.

It's just that "Caddyshack" reminds us what life was like before we got married, had children, an upside-down mortgage, and a gas guzzling car that's out of warranty.

The only thing that even comes close is "The Blues Brothers," which women think is even dumber.

Blasphemy!

Reach Ken Burger at kburger@postandcourier.com or 937-5598 or follow him on Twitter at www.twitter.com/Ken_Burger.