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Rant and Rave: Trump is the mayor from Jaws

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Mayor from Jaws

Views expressed are those of our readers, not us. Need to get something off your chest? Leave a message with your rant or rave at 765-0707 ext. 126 or email RANTandRAVE@free-times.com. Submissions will be edited for length and spelling but not grammar. Please limit emailed submissions to 100 words.

If you go back to Jaws, the mayor is encouraging people to go back to the beach and go back swimming, even though there is a shark in the water. The mayor says, “Those beaches will be open.” The president wants churches packed, golf courses packed and campaign rallies packed.

You’ll call me a liar, but people who love money — deep, deep, deep inside — hate themselves. That’s why you see some of this hatred. For people who love money, there is no rock bottom.

Some people don’t wear masks, but 125,000 people have died from this virus.

To watch these shows where these little kids disappear, I always think we should put a big f#!king dog beside every kid in America.

The next time a white grandmother lady tells you that our dear president is a businessman, just ask her, “How can you lose your ass running a casino?”

I’ve been home so much during this pandemic I’m starting to figure what I should put on my bucket list. Yeah.

Wait, so the Free Times spends almost all their time asking citizens to hide under their beds and wait out the pandemic all the while criticizing restaurants that open their dining rooms and constantly editorialize that people should only be doing takeout, but ALSO the Free Times is putting on a food and wine festival for 400 people in August? LOL, I guess it’s all about the mighty dollar for you guys too. Sad hypocrites.

Street justice, as it may be called, goes on in the human race. It is with terrible sadness and shame that I see pictures of George Floyd’s face. He was a person and street justice is not what law enforcement personnel are supposed to be doing.

It’s not a good time for you to come over to my house. I’ve got copperheads in the yard. They don’t look like much and they’re not real big but they are bona fide PIT VIPERS. I need help with this.

The law and order president just commuted the prison sentence of his felon friend, Roger Stone. Are we supposed to believe the president cares about law and order? No, I think not.

The Cameron Curmudgeon hopes that none in your readership are next door neighbors to Alex Jones from Info Wars. That nut says he is going to kill and eat his neighbors.

I’ve been bored during the pandemic. Thank goodness for NASCAR and UFC.

You know, if you are a parent and your child starts to hang out with drug dealers, you put a stop to it, because at some point, no matter what, he or she will dabble in dealing drugs. It is a question of who you hang out with. It does rub off on kids and people.

Oh, my God. Here we go again. This is BG, the Blind Guy. I’m looking at a bunch of racist sighted people. What about how y’all are holding the blind down?

This is Figaro. What is this stuff y’all are talking about, changing the name of products? What about Mrs. Buttersworth? Yeah, I banged her. So what?

Even if you don’t believe in the virus, can’t you wear a mask?

Yeah, it looks like the next war shall be Kosovo. Albania versus Serbia. Yeah, watch that, television fans. It looks like the turmoil continues.

Confucius says, “When anger rises, think of the consequences.”

This is the Columbia Yeah Guy, I ate at Smiley’s BBQ in Elgin. The food was great and the service was excellent.

With the world going the way it is today, we need to move from protest to policy.

If you go on a date with a girl with the last name Julian, is that a Julian date?

Seems like all the Democrats have for president is senile, and all he ran against is crazy.

Enough is enough. California is talking about the name of John Wayne Airport because of something he said back in the 1970s.

The Columbia car dealer Dick Dyer passed away. Rest in peace, Mr. Dyer.

I just want to say that, back in the 1970s I was in Oakland, California and I saw Lynyrd Skynyrd. I think I paid $10 for a ticket. There were people of many races at this concert. There were Confederate flags all over the place. There was no violence, no protesting, no nothing. Just good, Southern rock ‘n’ roll, that we all enjoyed. This was in California.

So, let me see if I get this straight. Donald Trump gives the commencement speech at West Point, either not knowing or disregarding the information that the very people he’s speaking to have had a bounty put on them by Russia, to be killed if they go to war. And the biggest slippery slope he worried about was that ramp going down.

If racism is such a sin for white people, it’s just as much a sin for black people.

I just got my copy of Free Times and I see you are having Best Of Columbia coming up. How in the hell can you have Best Of Columbia when you are in the middle of a pandemic? Most of the restaurants are on the verge of bankruptcy and people don’t have jobs. You should be staying home. Don’t you think we should wait to have Best Of Columbia?

I’ve seen Secretary of Education Betsy DeVos interviewed a few times. What is the problem? Ms. DeVos is not capable of holding a conversation. She repeats her talking points like a robot and that’s all you’re going to get from her.

The quaint old expression “ignorance is bliss” applies to 90 percent of the current rant and ravers.

Sorry to see the demise of Post-Echo, Caitlin you’ll always be the hottest girl in Columbia.

Lindsey Graham is an animated Confederate statue.

So, I walk into my local Dollar General in South Congaree. I’m the only customer out of five wearing a mask. Even cashier is without. Is it laziness? Stupidity? Selfishness?

For goodness sakes, it is unbelievable the number of people who write to Rant and Rave who suffer so severely from Trump Derangement Syndrome!

I see the plan. POTUS is going to get the country to bounce back from COVID-19 with gaslighting and threats. We the people are suffering. We need real help, not what he’s dishing out.

Side-by-side headlines on a local TV website read: “DHEC announces first COVID-19 pediatric death” and “SC governor says schools must reopen in person as other state leaders remain wary.” We are a special kind of stupid, aren’t we?

Love fact checking the Rant and Rave. On 7/8/2020 somebody said Bush was the reason all of our manufacturing went to China. Clinton got them Permanent Normal Trade Relations.

We should all take note that calumny is a mortal sin.

Your rules for email rants and raves limit submissions to a maximum of 100 words. A Trump rant in the July 15 edition is 113 words long. What’s up with that? Power of the press? Oh wait, maybe it was phoned in?

He told us he wants to share his tax returns with us but he just can’t because they are being audited. And now he is at the Supreme Court fighting to keep his tax returns secret. FOLLOW THE MONEY.

I have some driving ideas: If the guy in front of you hits his brakes just slow down. If your turn is coming up, don’t hurry around the guy in front of you and then hit your brakes to make your right turn. Leave home 10 minutes earlier so you don’t have to drive like a NASCAR driver.

It is time that Donald Trump uses his magic Sharpie again. I don’t like the numbers on COVID-19.

What’s with all the murals in Cayce? It reminds me of a third world country.

Whaley convenience store. Went in. USC cop at register. No mask. “Forgot it in cruiser,” he says. Brushed against me on way out. Appalled, I was. Went to nearby spirits store. Nurse. No mask. Coughing. Left, I did. Beerless. Sigh.

I’m learning French. My dream is to be in my kitchen, chopping vegetables, while Jules et Jim plays on the TV and to be able to understand EVERYTHING without having to poke my head into the living room to read the subtitles.

So tired of bums and panhandlers around downtown Columbia with their little signs at every stop light or gas station begging for my hard earned money. Columbia Police Department rides by with a blind eye, like they’re not even there harassing the public. Seriously, I thought panhandling was illegal? Come on CPD get off your ass and do something about it and enforce the law you’re getting paid to do. Slack asses.

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