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Rant and Rave: Sit down, Taste Buds

  • Updated
John A. Carlos II

Gov. Henry McMaster gives updates on the state’s preparedness for COVID-19 at the state emergency operations center on March 15, 2020. The governor announced Friday that businesses in all 46 counties can apply for low-interest loans provided through the U.S. Small Business Administration. File/John A. Carlos II/Special to The Post & Courier

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McMaster said the “Taste Buds” can’t go NOWHERE.

Pro-life Lt. Gov. Dan Patrick wants to throw grandma under the bus to save our country. Will he watch an ultrasound recording of every coronavirus infected senior 24 hours before death occurred?

The U.S. declared War on Poverty, War on Crime, War on Drugs, and tried to Whip Inflation Now. The War on Coronavirus will likely be just as successful. Why is our first response to a complex problem a military approach?

Why did Peg, my one-legged waitress, fall head over heels for me? I gave her a big tip!

Trump administration wants to go against all sound medical advice and increase exposure to the coronavirus in order to “save the economy.” And the Lt. governor of Texas is exhorting senior citizens to “take one for the team,” and by that he means don’t insist that the government keep their well-being in mind, to enable the rich to become richer. Jesus didn’t die for the US economy and neither should I. These people are asking some people to risk their lives so that some can profit. Jesus must be soooooo proud.

Our country is in a large-scale disease crisis. Leadership is acutely needed by all of us. Our president says that he accepts no responsibility at all. We are up a creek without a paddle.

I guess it had to happen. As H.L. Mencken said, “As democracy is perfected, the office of president represents, more and more closely, the inner soul of the people. On some great and glorious day, the plain folks of the land will reach their heart’s desire at last and the White House will be adorned by a downright moron.” Folks, we are there.

Are the TV ratings for the daily so-called coronavirus updates good enough to please our CHOSEN ONE?

Considering the situation in Washington, DC, maybe there was some significance to the date being the 87th Anniversary of the 1933 German Enabling Act? Interesting reading, if one cares to look it up!

[In reference to Rant and Rave, March 18] To the guy who challenged Trump haters: I’m not a Trump HATER, I just can’t stand the guy, but, just for a few examples: Lately, he said COVID-19 is a hoax, his father died of the flu, Congress is behind him because he gave them the highest raise ever. He says he has the highest IQ ever.

Trump is an idiot. If you are a Trump supporter you are an even bigger idiot. Add to that, he is a draft dodger, the lowest piece of scum alive.

On my latest list of human scum, I have moved developers to the top position with marketers at number two.

It’s a rave for the feds. The U.S. Securities and Exchange Commission has brought fraud accusations against SCE&G and SCANA over the VC Summer Nuclear Plant SCAM.

He says he felt it was a pandemic long before it was called a pandemic. Yeah, right. That would be while he told our nation that it was a new hoax from the Democrats and a story made up by the fake news media.

Donald Trump’s bronzer, brought to you and him by Dick Dyer.

Columbia drivers are the reason cyclists need to carry guns. If you threaten my life on a whim, you give me permission to end yours.

WIS News 10 now offers…NEVERMIND when the First Alert is bogus.

Our whole economy needs to be directed away from being development and mortgage-based. How about an economy based on recycling and preserving the planet?

Presidential: FDR — “We have nothing to fear but fear itself.” Truman — “The buck stops here.” Trump — “I take no responsibility at all.”

Russia and Saudi Arabia are flooding the oil market to drive America out of the oil business. You still think Russia wants Trump as our president?

Are you kidding me? I saw a billboard on the interstate that said “Last Starbucks for 35 miles this exit.” Really? That’s the unbearable distance to have to wait for a Starbucks fix? Addicts!

In America, people love Trump. But the deal with Afghanistan does what? Puts 5,000 American-hating Taliban folks where? Back on the street.

You are on your own. Don’t f#!k with America.

Yeah, I’m worried about the coronavirus. When’s the last time you saw an Uber driver work from home.

My son asked me if I would go see KC and the Sunshine Band. I said, “Uh huh, that’s the way I like it.”

My friend wants to get rid of his wife. He might pick up a copy of Oriental Trading.

Everybody has a new dap out now, bumping elbows. Did they forget they were coughing and sneezing into those elbows? Might as well sneeze and cough into each others’ faces if they are going to bump elbows.

Pray like it’s up to God. Work at it like it’s up to you.

Damn, Mayor Benjamin. You ought to go take a dump in one of these bathrooms over in one of the city divisions. Oh, my God. In public works and other places it doesn’t seem like there’s any good ventilation. The bacteria will jump right on you.

People in South Carolina are running around scared, but with the help of the good Lord I’ll knock corona out.

I’m just sick of this damn pollen coming back and messing with my allergies and everybody thinks I have the coronavirus. What the f#!k? It’s just my sinuses, people.

I was watching the news and the governor said not to close the schools or any public events. Then he turns around later and does just that. Really?

If somebody wants to sue somebody over this coronavirus, why not sue the Chinese? I mean, this thing originated in China, so shouldn’t they be responsible for it?

To the brilliant fellow who was critical of Mike Pence’s appointment to the coronavirus task force [Rant and Rave, March 18]: When you finish updating your will, you may want to file it with Joe Biden’s cures for cancer, to which he was anointed by Obama in January 2016. There should be plenty of room.

Hey, folks. The Bible says you can always tell people by the fruit they bear. Trump Jr. has said some odd things. Who taught that young man to lie?

I really hope that, with this coronavirus that is running rampant across the U.S. right now, that somebody like North Korea and China and Russia don’t decide they want to invade the United States. Think about it. I know it’s way out there, but think about what we are going through right now. Really think about it.

I’m prepared. Are you?

Make sure you wash your hands, so you don’t infect the rest of us.

Do the Russians wash their hands?

My friend Twista went to the store to buy toe warmers. Why don’t he just wear socks? Yeah.

[In reference to City Watch, March 11] I think Clyburn needs a rebuttal. But I also think Kevin Fisher is just trying to kiss up to him. That’s really nasty.

Hey, somebody needs to talk about how this is going to affect the singles bars and how we go about meeting one another and the hook ups and all that. This will have a drastic impact on all those establishments. Godspeed!

Please continue to vote for Donald Trump. But please remember the Trump airlines and Trump University.

During these trying times, let us learn to live the life we sing about.

I’m like Prime Time. Ain’t no shame in my game. Bring me the bottom and the top piece of bread. I’ll sop it up.

Walt Disney World is closed. My God, the humanity.

The old idea of six degrees of separation has now been replaced with six feet of separation.

You ever been to California?

I’m sick about the fact that the owners of the Black Pearl strip club were actually in court fighting for their right to make black women dance on a pole, naked, for the enjoyment of black men. How dare these two men.

Bernie could whip Trump’s butt in a debate. Biden is going to struggle.

People call Lexington County a “rural” county. Why is a county with almost 300,000 inhabitants called “rural”?

Veterans, are you paying attention?

If you’d like to fix this virus problem, give everybody test kits, then everybody would know what’s what.

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