White House Clemson fast food

I ordered 300 hamburgers but I'm going to say I ordered 1,000 hamburgers. Why? It just sounds better, y'all. 

I wonder how the Clemson Tigers feel going all the way up to Washington, D.C. and get fed McDonald’s and Wendy’s for their championship meal? I find that funny! Surely there’s a better catering company in DC to feed them boys. But this Gamecock is laughing!

Great job, Clemson! We are proud of you! I'm sorry DJT served cold French fries and dollar-menu burgers for your White House celebration. 

We can't make America greater by eating junk food. The evidence tells us that junk food ruins our health. I recommend collards and black-eye peas. Eat local. Eat healthy.

Wouldn't it be more appropriate to change the logo from USC to SUC?

The purpose of the WIS First Alert is neither to prepare you nor to scare you. It is to keep you watching.

Rant going out to Meeting Place Church and its congregation for caring about the Decker Area. Warms my heart.

So we get $20 off our SCANA bill a month, and some prick that used to work for them walks away with $9 million? What the f#!k is wrong with this picture?

Mac Credille is retiring as the USC men’s and women’s basketball equipment manager after 46 years. He’s such an upbeat and outstanding guy. Everyone at USC is going to miss him.

Yeah, this is a shout out to the douchebag in the white Audi SUV that almost took out me and my dog behind the Circle K on New Year’s Eve, then on his way out almost ran over a little kid. I hope you didn’t hurt nobody getting your fireworks, asshole. Happy New Year, y’all! Peace.

The Columbia mayor is always talking about the BullStreet project. That’s a bunch of bull. Mental patients need a place to live.

You Trumpistas out there tell me how you can justify your president giving Syria over to the Russians. He has played right into Putin’s hand to our peril. Somebody explain that.

Man, this damn weather. Here lately we’ve been having, like, western Native American type weather: Apache fog.

Nothing sucks like a Kirby Deluxe, except maybe South Congaree.

Border wall? The earth don’t need no stinking border wall.

As far as fixing the damn roads, South Carolina will never fix these damn roads, and they’ll never give you any money back if your car is damaged, either. Really people?

[In response to Rant and Rave, Jan. 2] Crazed marijuana junkies robbing and stealing and killing? What person smoking weed is robbing, stealing and killing? They are too busy getting their munchies on.

The Cameron Curmudgeon says there is a real ongoing threat to voter integrity: Russian meddling. It is invasive and includes hundreds of thousands of people whose votes may have been swayed.

My friend likes eating at Lizard’s Thicket. He usually gets either the fried kangaroo meat or the lizard stew.

How many people work at the … um, let’s start again. [Hangs up]

How many people work at Ruby Tuesday? About half.

[In reference to Rant and Rave, Jan. 2] To the person who is negative about walking at night, I would inform him this is 2019. This ain’t the cave days. He needs to put down whatever he’s smoking and wake up. How the hell do you dance if you are not up walking around?

There’s a lot of lazy, stupid mofos around these parts.

Can we please get some white paint for the roads so we won’t keep running up on the concrete islands? I know we can hardly fix potholes, but at least we can keep from tearing up our cars. Please get some yellow and white paint.

The reason there are so many people on the highway getting killed is that everybody is in a hurry.

I believe that The Grand restaurant on Main Street sucks. Great concept, but the food sucks.

I’ve got a question that I bet even Einstein couldn’t answer: Why is it that these assholes who refuse to put their lights on in rainstorms are always driving dark colored vehicles. We’ve got educated people in Columbia, or so they say, somebody should get answer for that.

Why does Kevin Hart, an African-American comedian, get a walk on his homophobic comments from 10 years ago, but Paula Deen said the N-word 25 years ago and she lost all those endorsements?

This is a rant to all the people out there with the flu who can’t seem to keep their asses at home, who somehow think we want their funk. Newsflash: We don’t. I’m tired of going to public places like restaurants, bars, the movies, and work and having to deal with people coughing and hacking and blowing their nose all over the rest of us. No wonder everybody in town is sick. For God’s sake, go get the flu shot.

Vladimir and Donald were walking through the forest the other day. Suddenly, Vladimir grabs Donald’s shoulder and says, “Look out for the trees, son.”

Even if a wall is built we won’t be safe. I don’t want to pay $5 billion for a wall that won’t work. The president promised we wouldn’t have to pay.

Yes, this is a rave for the South Carolina highway department’s driver’s license division. I know sometimes they take a lot of heat when things don’t go right or don’t go the way customers think they should go. I misplaced my driver’s license and was unable to find it, right at Christmas. I applied for a replacement online and they got it to me by New Year’s Eve. That was some good service and they deserve credit for it.

The queen may enter parliament, but she will never be funkadelic.

I think the Dallas Cowboys cheerleaders play better than the Dallas Cowboys.

My girlfriend reminds me all the time that to catch a husband is an art, but to hold him is a job.

I asked my friend in an accountant office what job he had before. He says he was a bouncer at a biker bar.

Might as well legalize marijuana in South Carolina. If South Congaree is any example, it seems like all people do is sit around and eat anyway.

I guess back in 1609 the Native Americans should have built a wall.

Mr. Gorbachev, tear down Trump’s wall.

There’s a day for everything. The other day was National Pass Gas Day.

My favorite drink is Yoo-hoo. After I drink it I have to buy a soda.

I voted for Barack Obama. It wasn’t his fault that Pelosi and Reid printed so much money and threw it up in the air to every hand that was stretched out and now we’re in debt to the point we could never pay it off. And I will vote to re-elect Donald Trump. The same old Democrats, like Nancy Pelosi, are a disease.

President Trump, I may have been born during the day, but I wasn’t born today. I’ve seen eight presidents, and you just look like you are determined to be the stupidest president I’ve ever seen in my life. Why don’t you just stop trying to get all the glory. To God be the glory. Why don’t you stop being so stupid?

Can someone please tell me how long it will take for us to repair the damage Donald Trump is doing to our country?  

It's almost like everywhere you go and everyone you talk to around here, there is a general undertone of complacency coupled with an undeserving love and support for the city, similar to the love one might exhibit in a toxic family relationship. The school is the abusive father that always gets his way, the city just bends over and takes it in the ass, and citizens just try not to cry and accept that this is just the way things are.

The heck with the astrology kooks, bring back the reality forecaster, Tom Tomorrow's This Modern World.

The State newspaper has a deal for an online all sports edition. Yuck. But I might seriously consider a no sports edition. All three pages of it. 

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