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Rant and Rave: Fireball and pumpkin pie

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Crunchy Pumpkin Pie

Crunchy Pumpkin Pie

Views expressed are those of our readers, not us. Need to get something off your chest? Leave a message with your rant or rave at 765-0707 ext. 126 or email Submissions will be edited for length and spelling but not grammar. Please limit emailed submissions to 100 words.

Did you hear about the chairman who liked to drink prune juice mixed with vodka? He was tight chair with a loose stool.

Message to Cindi Boiter: Your hyper-critical opinions might be better received with a new photo where you are smiling and not looking down your nose and over your glasses like the old schoolmarms we hated. [In reference to Further Consideration, Sept. 9] Any chance of an apology for jumping the gun on Trump’s supposed lack of patriotism?

Free Times readers, to the evangelical, so-called Christians, if you still support the current resident of the White House after all he has said and done, please open your Bibles and read 1 Corinthians, verse 11.

I believe that new Free Times food writer David Clarey is a nice addition to the Columbia community. Yeah.

I like two kinds of music: country and western.

Yeah, I was just thinking, I wonder why the California psychics didn’t warn everybody to get out before the fires started?

Hey folks, if you see the nice rain, try to imagine 40 days and 40 nights of it, nonstop.

Adam Mintzer saw a tree, a full stump and rocks floating down the Congaree River.

I love you folks. WIS news is showing the weather in blood red these days.

The GOP right wing claims that the Democratic party is a radical left organization are demonstrably false. The far left has not yet taken the party over. But they sure are working on it.

I drive for Uber every Saturday morning. About 10 riders each Saturday. All black, going to work. I pass black people waiting at bus stops. Then I sit at the light next to African Americans in Mercedes, Cadillacs, Lexus, Lincoln Navigators. Then I hear the news about Antifa and BLM. This picture sickens me. Help each other and quit hating our country.

Some of you old-timers will remember the novelty song from the sixties, riffing on the Peanuts comic strip: “He’s a clown / that Charlie Brown.. .” Here’s my update: “Donald Trump, Donald Trump / He’s a lump, that Donald Trump. / He’s gonna get caught/ Just you wait and see. .. (Trump) “Why is everybody always picking on me?” Incredibly, Trump has whined his way into the hearts of his supporters.

The first step to dividing the country is to convince people the country is falling apart and Democrats are the cause. Then there are people enjoy being outraged as well as being told what to think. People like Rush Limbaugh, Ann Coulter and Glenn Beck were only too happy to cater to those people. And make a boatload of money doing so. Then along comes Rupert Murdoch and devotes a 24 hour “news” channel to the cause. Next, we put a moron in the White House who thrives on divisiveness, cares for nothing but himself and is incapable of leadership. And presto. We have an Anti-Democratic party.

To the woman at Ollie’s off Bush River Road Sept. 20 who was too inconvenienced by the ambulance blocking you in as they were loading and assessing a child: I want you to remember that you’re a c#!t for trying to get them to move and slamming your door so hard I thought you’d break your window. That person is someone’s child, how dare you act the way you did. Shame on you. It took every ounce of my composure to not say that to you directly. To the momma and family, I hope your child is okay and please know we’re thinking about you.

And the hits keep on coming. Now Lindseed Grayham blames the “liberal media” for his Senate actions. You sir are a bigoted hypocrite, sad excuse for a man. Neither you nor King Don walk the walk.

So, Katrina Shealy, your law has failed. That means that the illegal snack permits in Lexington need to be gone and returned to the Commission for the Blind.

This is a rave for Adair Boroughs, candidate for U.S. House in the 2nd District. She is hard-working. She regularly pulls in more money than Joe Wilson. She is passionate. Her life’s work has been helping others. She’s very smart, and went to Stanford Law.

Why would South Carolina elect Jaime Harrison to the Senate when he would vote the exact opposite of Tim Scott on practically everything?

Virtual school is kind of like virtual [phone line gets cut].

Last week’s Rant and Rave [Sept. 16] got something wrong. Lindsey Graham is married, but not to Tim Scott. Lindsey Graham is married to Donald Trump.

Riverbanks Zoo isn’t doing a great job with their face mask rule. Last weekend, I estimated one in 10 were not wearing face masks. When I complained, staff said there was nothing they could do about it. Riverbanks Zoo is putting profits before people.

The Cameron Curmudgeon is telling the people of South Carolina to vote like their lives depend on it, because they probably do.

I can’t believe the University of South Carolina marching band is 100 years old. Happy birthday.

It’s bad enough that we are in the middle of a pandemic and my favorite time of year is here and I’m barely making enough money to keep my lights on. And now I have to pay extra, as football season starts, to watch my favorite teams, South Carolina and that other state team, on the SEC channel and ACC channel.

The taxpayers are paying 18 percent on top of every contract that they pay for through public entities.

This is Figaro. I was out robbing a Dollar General the other day, and I ran into BG, the Blind Guy. He kept saying, “But.” I said, “What do you have Marina Syndrome? You been watching that lady on channel 57 in the morning?” Every time, I turn around, that woman is saying, “But.” She says it so much I can’t stop looking at her butt.

During my education, I heard very little about the Constitution. What did you hear?

The biggest issue this year is, “Is the truth important?” If the truth isn’t important, who can we believe, who can we trust?

A truck carrying Vicks VapoRub overturned on the interstate. There was no congestion for eight hours.

I would never say Sumter is a boring town, but I spent two weeks there one night.

My wife and I do not have a dog. We have a granddog.

The Clemson football team destroyed The Citadel and shut them out. That’s like the Gamecocks playing Lower Richland High.

I saw a recipe for pumpkin pie with fireball. Fall is here.

Those stinking Republicans made Obama forgo a Supreme Court appointment in his last months in office and allow the next administration to choose. The sleazeballs should do the same now.

While president of the Christian school, Liberty University, Jerry Falwell, Jr. was photographed with a cocktail glass in his hand. He later said “black water” was in the glass. Later, he was found passed out drunk with liquor bottles near him. Liberty University students are not allowed to drink and they have to get tested to be sure of it.

When we keep hearing how harmful plastic is, why is it so hard to buy groceries without extra added plastic in the packaging? Apples come in plastic purses now. Ice cream and oatmeal have plastic lids. You could get ice cream in a one-piece paper box not that long ago. Stores should bring that back.

Can you not print the Rant and Raves where people give themselves stupid nicknames in their posts? “The Bear” “The Yeah Guy” etc. It bums me out thinking someone’s life is sad enough for them to do something like that.

So King Donald brags that he’s consistently shot in the low 70s playing golf. What he doesn’t reveal is that’s his true score per nine holes.

I have been hoping that it will just go away like a miracle. But I have decided to vote in November to make sure it does.

WIS news should change their name to the Dominic Brown show. He’s giving weather every five minutes, followed by commercials about him giving weather.

We have three percent of the world’s population and we have 22 percent of all COVID cases. And the president says that he is doing an A+ job on the virus. Are you kidding

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