Crime Blotter Pack of Doggos

This information comes from local police reports. It does not mean anyone is guilty. This is not a court of law.

Poppin’ Pills: Authorities are charging a 54-year-old woman after they found drugs in her car and in her purse during a check-in at a parole office. Yes, you read that right. The woman, out on parole for, you guessed it, a drug violation, decided to show up to her first meet-and-greet (is that what they’re called?) with drugs in her purse and car. She had cocaine, crack, meth and a few other thangs on her. Hell, she probably even had Flintstone vitamins.

Dog Fighting: A 47-year-old Columbia man has been sentenced to two years for running a dog fighting operation. Authorities found over $11,000 and paraphernalia used for the type of operation and seized 13 pit bulls. Now, to cheer us all up after hearing something like this, go to Instagram and follow DoggosDoingThings. If you’re on the page for about an hour or two at a time looking at cute AF puppies, nobody will judge you. Especially me since it’s what I do instead of going out to parties these days. You’re welcome.

Changing Plates: Authorities charged a 42-year-old woman with grand larceny and forgery for stealing three vehicles from her ex-roommate. The suspect reportedly took the titles of three cars and changed them over to her name. She also snatched a fridge, television, two DVD players and a laptop. That’s crazy, right? Who in the hell still uses DVD players? Get yourself a PS4 or Roku, you freak! The lady stole much more but eventually was found out when the victim went to the DMV and found all his stuff registered to someone else. What this lady did was absolutely wrong, taking all of this guy’s stuff, but her talents seem wasted. She would’ve been a magical divorce attorney.

Tip of the Week: The maxim “If at first you don’t succeed, try again” shouldn’t be associated with crime. Cops nabbed a 39-year-old man after he reportedly broke in to three businesses. He went to jail and then after he got out, broke into a few more. Sounds like a determined fellow — but if you get arrested every time you break in, you may want to look at another career. Hell, if you have a car with insurance, you can make bank doing Dine & Dash.

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