Since we're all stuck in our homes and can't go to weddings, the next best thing is to watch a rom-com one on Netflix and remember a time when we could dress fancy and be around people.
The service’s recently released film Love Wedding Repeat was written and directed by Dean Craig, who wrote 2007's Death at a Funeral and decided he liked the idea so much that he did a black American version with Chris Rock and Martin Lawrence with the same damn name in 2010. There has to be something with Brits and the humor they find in weddings and funerals (hello, Four Weddings and a Funeral).
The movie opens with one of those sequences that shows the universe with a voiceover, this one coming from The Oracle (Penny Ryder), who pontificates, “We live in a universe that's ruled by chaos and chance, where all it takes is just one moment of ill fortune for all our hopes and dreams to go right down the sh#!ter.” If by dreams, she means hopes for a good movie, then it’s a pretty accurate metaphor for what this one does across the course of an hour and 40 minutes.
After the wisdom of The Oracle, we meet Jack (Sam Claflin), trying to psych himself up to tell the girl he's been hanging out with that he really digs her. The girl is Dina (Olivia Munn), a friend of Jack's sister, who he happens to bump into in Italy. Even though Dina's the friend of the sister, Jack hangs with her and they have some chemistry going. But he has to leave soon to fly back to London. Cue weird moment where they are waiting for a goodbye kiss, and somehow some other random bloke that Jack went to school with in London runs up to say hey. The guy hugs him and says he's going back to London, as well, and can drive them.
The school buddy stands around maximizing his interference, and the kiss is downgraded to a handshake. That's the start of the movie. And Jack somehow is crushed about the girl that got away. In the words of Ricky Bobby, it “ain't worth a velvet painting of a whale and a dolphin gettin' it on.”
First of all, who the hell is this guy jumping in the middle of the conversation? The guy literally is catching a flight to London at the same time? And why couldn't Jack tell this arsehole to back off because he has smooching to do with Olivia Freakin' Munn.
The rest of the movie is just as absurd, as it goes along creating calamities for the sake of plot with bad, lazy writing.
Three years later, Jack's sister Hayley (Eleanor Tomilson) is getting married, a place where exes and old flames and would-be lovers often get thrown back together, and of course Dina shows up. But the most troubling is Marc (Jack Farthing), someone from Hayley's past who shows up in a drugged-out state and tries to ruin the wedding and win the bride. He wasn't invited, but instead of just getting rid of him, Hayley convinces her brother to drug him with sleeping drops in his drink to knock him out so he won't ruin the wedding.
Word? This is the solution the writer decided to come up with?
“Let's go full Bill Cosby at the wedding! It'll be hilarious.”
If that wasn't corny enough, some kids get the place cards mixed up, which means someone else ends up getting the sleepy drops instead.
Disaster ensues. But then the movie rewinds and then shows all different scenarios of different people getting drugged and how lives can all change with just one thing going awry. In all of the instances, they never improve the movie.
And in copping much of the blueprint for The Butterfly Effect, Love Wedding Repeat proves that the 2004 Ashton Kutcher vehicle was also a s#!tty movie.