Triggered I am. So, so triggered. But I’m not having a meltdown. Nor am I weeping on YouTube or posting long, grammatically-incorrect rants on Instagram. I’m not canceling anyone or anything.
All I’m doing is crunching a dozen Tic-Tacs and mumbling, “Jesus, take the wheel.”
My triggers are ignorance, over-the-top woke-ism and people wailing when the mailman leaves, because abandonment issues. OK, the last one is fake, but you know it’s coming.
People are offended by everything. If you’re too woke, you’re a joke. If you’re not woke, cue the torches and pitchforks.
If you express the “wrong” opinion, get ready for screams of “Educate yourself!” or “Stop protecting bullies!” or “Take a seat — all the seats!” (A woke way of saying sit down and shut up.)
Let me be blunt: Any form of prejudice stinks.
Native Americans, blacks and Jews have been persecuted to an extent I will never fully comprehend, and they’re not alone.
In the 19th century, Irish immigrants were welcomed to America by shop signs that said: “Help Wanted. No Irish need apply.” They were considered filthy, lazy and immoral.
More than 120,000 Japanese-Americans were locked in remote barbed-wire internment camps during World War II. They lost jobs, homes, everything — only because they were Asian.
Most of us have struggled as denizens of an imperfect world. My theory is, if you’re breathing, you have a moral obligation to help others. If you can’t, just don’t hurt anybody.
Could someone tell that to Demi Lovato? She is wildly popular on social media, with millions of Twitter and Instagram followers. Last week she posted a rage-filled rant about … an LA yogurt shop’s sugar-free options.
This wealthy young pop star is super-vocal about her addiction/eating/self-harm/daddy issues. Hey, whatever helps you heal. But at some point, you have to stop blaming the world for your problems.
Last week Ms. Lovato went into The Bigg Chill for fro-yo, and her world came crashing down.
“Finding it extremely hard to order fro-yo when you have to walk past tons of sugar free cookies/other diet foods before you get to the counter. Do better please,” she posted.
She said the seeing the products was “triggering and awful” for her as a bulimic. She left without ordering and claimed it ruined her weekend. (Insert eyeroll here.)
The Bigg Chill pushed back by pointing out that, HELLO! Diabetics deserve fro-yo, too.
“For the past 36 years, our small woman-owned business has catered to anyone who’s come through the door… [with] diabetic, vegan, gluten-free, or decadent desserts, we’ve always tried to have something for everyone,” the company said.
Ms. Lovato continued to rant, claiming many people “struggle DAILY to even step foot in your store. You can find a way to provide an inviting environment for people with different needs, including eating disorders. Don’t make excuses, just do better.”
Hahahaha! When you’re “triggered” because a li’l shop offers sugar-free items, you are clearly booty-hurt beyond outpatient help.
I’m happy to say many social media users lambasted her for bullying — yes, that’s the right word — a small business struggling to survive in a pandemic.
Then she doubled down: “People with eating disorders should be able to go in and feel safe wherever they go to eat. That's all I'm asking,” she said.
Crying about feeling unsafe around sugar-free fro-yo is an insult to soldiers who are unsafe in the Middle East, and everyone else who’s unsafe because of war, domestic violence, street crime or abject poverty.
Ms. Lovato, you are an embarrassment. Educate yourself. Then take all the seats.