Parents should stand firm on healthy eating
PARENT TO PARENT
Q: "I have three children, and we are trying to promote healthy food and snacks in our house. They constantly want more and more junk. We do not want to make food a big issue or make certain things forbidden. It's a real struggle." — a mother in Apex, N.C.
A: Food bans backfire. Sit-down meals and snacks are the trick.
"Hold the ground on timing, with the snack right after school," says Ellyn Satter, registered dietitian in Madison, Wis. "The children can't munch and schmooze and sit in front of the television with a bucket of chips."
What's a parent to do, as stats show more and more children are obese? The philosophy Satter has shared for four decades in books, workshops and counseling: "Parents are responsible for the what, when and where of feeding. Children are responsible for the how much and whether of eating."
Ignore the begging, pleading and whining, some parents suggest. Instead, offer a variety of healthy options and occasional treats.
Don't allow marathon snacking in front of the television, says Satter, author of "Secrets of Feeding a Healthy Family" (Kelcy Press, $19.95. 2008). Offer snacks right after school at the table; then, the kitchen is closed until dinner.
For the elementary school-age child, offer limited snack choices that include protein, fat and carbohydrate, she suggests. As the child gets older, give her the chance to be more independent with the snack selection.
"Controlling the timing of the snack is really what's important," she says. "Timing is more critical than what the child actually eats. Timing is the ace in the hole."
A Buffalo, N.Y., mother of two boys, ages 1 and 4, says her family has dealt with the syndrome of "never enough treats" with her 4-year-old. It's easy to give food as a reward, she says, even though she knows it's not a good idea.
"What we've been doing to stop the ongoing demands is to stick to what we say we are going to do," the Buffalo mom says.
The parents praise their son for not begging. They ignore his whining and have stopped making sweets a big deal. "We started being random about it and tried to give a treat without a reason, all in moderation," she says.
A mother in Providence, R.I., suggests telling the children that mom makes the choices of what to buy and what to offer. Don't buy sweets if the kids whine and fuss over limits. By about age 12, children can learn basic food-selection principles and become responsible for what they choose.
It's no crime to let your child buy the occasional candy bar, with her own money, Satter says.
U.S. Dietary Guidelines, revised in 2005, include some wiggle room in a day's recommended calories for about 165-195 "discretionary calories," for a portion of cookies, for example. But not a brownie at lunch, cookies for a snack and pudding after dinner.
To taste good and to keep a child satisfied until dinnertime, a snack needs to include protein, fat and carbohydrate, says Satter, whose Web site is ellynsatter.com.
To get advice on options that fit your family, check out the food pyramid at pyramid.gov.
Betsy Flagler, a journalist based in Davidson, N.C., teaches preschool and is the mother of a teenage son. If you have tips or questions, please e-mail us at p2ptips@att.net or call Parent to Parent at 704-236-9510.
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