Well, that accomplished nothing.
The Lowcountry began 2013 fighting over cruise ships, highways and development, praising Boeing for its grand benevolence and thumping our chests over a Conde Nast ranking.
And that's pretty much how the year ended.
The only difference is now Mayor Joe Riley has a new hip.
But just to recap, here's what else happened in 2013:
In January, South Carolina's entire congressional delegation - except for Jim Clyburn - developed symptoms of memory loss dating back to 1989 when it voted against federal aid for states devastated by Super storm Sandy.
Eager to join such a lovable - and popular - group of miscreants, 16 Republicans filed to run for Tim Scott's open seat in Congress.
Proponents of limiting cruise ships in Charleston held a conference here in February, only to see their publicity stolen by the state Department of Transportation when it announced plans to cut down every tree on Interstate 26 leading into the city.
The two groups briefly argued over who had the rights to the slogan "Just say None."
The environment was still under attack in March, when the state revealed plans to build a bridge over the Wando River that would be roughly the size of the Great Wall of China.
Folks on Sullivan's Island could feel Wando's pain. That same month, the Charleston County School District decided to build small elementary schools in McClellanville and Edisto after refusing to build Sullivan's a new school unless it could be seen from space.
But we learned that the environment is in no trouble in April, when the Department of Health and Environmental Control admitted it had shelved a report blaming several of the Lowcountry's ecological maladies on climate change. Officials with the state agency said there was "nothing to see here."
Still, Mark Sanford showed his commitment to the environment by debating a completely recyclable cardboard cut-out of Nancy Pelosi as he continued his campaign for the 1st District congressional seat.
And in May, Charleston County Council killed plans for a massive, taxpayer-subsidized development on Johns Island. After months of leading the people - and the developers - to believe this was a done deal, the council released a press release that said, "Just kidding."
Those guys are such jokers.
But no one was laughing in June, when the state Supreme Court threw out part of the lawsuit that cruise ship opponents had filed against Carnival Cruise Lines, the city and the State Ports Authority.
Justices put to rest questions about the economic benefits of cruise ships when they noted that the industry created a lot of jobs in the Lowcountry - mostly for lawyers.
Speaking of jobs, in July the Bravo TV network filmed a new show called "Southern Charm" in downtown Charleston. Out-of-work cruise ship lawyers briefly thought they might have a future in false advertising law when it was revealed the show featured few southerners, and no charm.
The true Lowcountry charm was on full display in August, however, when tea partiers gathered in North Charleston to berate a cardboard cut-out of Lindsey Graham, apparently for being a little too chummy with Sanford's cardboard cut-out of Nancy Pelosi.
In September, Daniel Islanders decided to secede from Berkeley County when they learned that Piggly Wiggly was closing. They vowed to continue their efforts even after they learned that the Pig was moving out of Charleston and Dorchester counties, too.
Piggly Wiggly sold most of its stores to Bi-Lo and Harris Teeter, defending their actions by noting they had been "Local Since Forever" and that was long enough.
A week later, Bi-Lo announced its new slogan would be "Local Since September."
Our spirits rose some in October, when Conde Nast named Charleston the greatest city in the Milky Way galaxy for the third year in a row.
That same month, locals reported an increased number of UFO sightings along Interstate 26, but no one could get any pictures because of all the trees.
In November, SCE&G announced plans to end its weather normalization program, which allowed customers to pay for electricity they would use in 2026 on their current monthly bills. Company officials had claimed the plan would lead to lower bills in the future . for SCE&G.
Finally, in December, local officials signed off on the DOT's plan to cut down all the trees along I-26.
This was most likely in response to complaints by locals, who were still having a hard time getting decent photos of UFOs.
Reach Brian Hicks at firstname.lastname@example.org.
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