Mom makes time for fitness while helping care for family

If there were a local mom who could say, "I don't have time to exercise," it likely would be Mary Caroline Rhea.

When she married her high school sweetheart, John Rhea, three years ago, she had four sons from a previous marriage and he had three sons from a previous marriage. They then added a daughter to the mix. Their eight children range in age from 2 to 14.

But Rhea is not only fit, she's a fitness guru to many, a personal trainer and author of two self-published books: "Managing Life With Kids" and "Lose Weight, Feel Great! Even After Kids."

Last week, she launched a new website, todaysbalancedmom.com.

By the way, she also helps with her husband's business, Charleston Original Sauces.

So it's no wonder that people ask how she does it all.

In a way, Rhea, who grew up in the athletic, active Heath family in Mount Pleasant, views each day like a competitive challenge.

"I also get a thrill out of being productive," she says. "The days I maintain and don't do something to move forward, that's a bad day for me. I have to have maintenance and productivity. And at the end of the day, I say that's a good day."

She and John point to three keys.

Organization

John says she keeps a calendar by her side at all times.

"Mary's good at being organized. Her best friend, next to me, is her Day Timer. She's always writing in it," he says. "You have to be organized in a life of chaos because every day is chaotic and every day is different and every day is a new challenge."

Most days start for her at 5:45 a.m. with laundry or dishes, working on the computer for an hour before tending to the kids and getting them off to school. Then it's usually off to teach an outdoor boot camp, during which she usually squeezes in her own exercise.

She and John also use the hours after the kids go to bed to work on their businesses.

Self-sufficiency

A large part of the organizational component is that each child has daily tasks, she says.

"(The) kids have to participate. They come home from school, eat a snack, have two chores and then they have to go outside. They know that routine. Seven boys. That's 14 chores. They pitch in a lot because they have to," she says.

A fan of the book "A Nation of Wimps: The High Cost of Invasive Parenting," she says that "one of my biggest pet peeves are parents that are overburdening."

"That's what's going on in our society is that everybody is micro-managing children and not letting them be children. I couldn't do it," she says. "I'd be institutionalized or drugged up if I thought I had to do everything. I think some moms out there drive themselves nuts doing that. ... Kids feel more confident if they can contribute."

Balance

Getting children to help plays into what Rhea says she thinks is the most important component: seeking balance.

"I strive for balance, but there's no way I can have eight kids and be balanced. It's something that you continually strive for. If you don't, you'd pull your hair out and miss out on all the fun," says Rhea.

That fun, for her, can range from a short-lived treat, such as getting a hot stone massage or haircut to an afternoon on the boat with her family.

"I see a lot of moms who give up who they are when they have kids," says Rhea. "You can be balanced and happy. Women feel so bad about feeling guilty. ... You have to take time out or you'll be in a strait-jacket."

Balance also includes other aspects of life that may not be associated with health or relaxation. Parts of her books also pertain to financial planning, including saving at least 10 percent of your income.

"It's everything because being healthy is about being balanced. (The website) is a one-stop, how to be a better mom and spouse and keep it together without going insane."

Reach David Quick at 937-5516.