Spirit of Christmas comes to home's mothers-to-be

It might seem as if the women who hosted a dinner and baby shower Dec. 17 at the Florence Crittenton Programs of South Carolina in Charleston have nothing in common with the unwed pregnant girls the program serves.

The women came together at the request of Nicole Thomas, 28, of James Island. Thomas wanted to do something to teach her children the meaning of Christmas and made a personal choice to help the girls at Florence Crittenton.

Thomas became a mother when she was 17. In 1997, pregnant girls weren't allowed to attend Wando High School, and a guidance counselor asked Thomas if she would be interested in Florence Crittenton.

Florence Crittenton offers unwed mothers a residency program at its St. Margaret Street facility and a day program. Thomas attended a day program.

"I had a great experience. I felt like it had a huge impact on the type of mother I ended up being," Thomas said.

She pitched an idea to her friends. What about a homemade dinner of ham and side dishes and a baby shower? Thomas enlisted four or five longtime friends, who reached out to their friends, and the idea took off. Thomas wound up with enough sponsors for 15 girls.

She gave each woman a list of items to purchase for each girl. The list included all the newborn necessities so the girls would be able to go home from the hospital with everything they need. One woman who called too late to be assigned to someone volunteered to buy 15 strollers.

Each sponsor also bought a diaper bag. The majority were monogrammed with the babies' initials or first names.

The women didn't forget the girls, either. Each received seven gifts that included a makeup kit, body lotion and bath scrub, earrings, pair of gloves and calendar.

"Being able to accomplish any goal in life is to have confidence in yourself and feel good about yourself. I really wanted them to know it's not just about the babies," Thomas said.

Brickney McKenzie, 18, of Columbia cried as she opened her gifts "because no one has done this before." Her baby boy is due in February.

Her sponsor, Courtney West of Johns Island, also got teary-eyed. "I was in her situation 17 years ago," West said.

She was pregnant at 19 and had her daughter when she was 20. "She understands what I'm going through," McKenzie said.

Even with the support of family and friends, Thomas said she knows it's hard to be young, unmarried and pregnant.

"I can sympathize with what these girls are going through, the loneliness, feeling ostracized and alienated. I was 17. Some of them are younger than that," she said.

Thomas learned that the girl she sponsored wouldn't have anyone with her for a Caesarean section scheduled for Dec. 18 at Medical University Hospital.

"It broke my heart when I found out about that. It's hard enough being a young mother, a teenage mother, and everything you feel and go through, but can you imagine going through it completely by yourself," she said.

So Thomas spent most of the morning of Dec. 18 by the side of the young woman she sponsored. Thomas had never seen a surgery before, but watching doctors bring a healthy baby boy into the world was an amazing experience, she said.

In addition to the dinner and shower, Thomas and her friends raised about $1,000 in donations for Florence Crittenton, which is experiencing financial difficulties. Earlier this year, it appeared the program might have to fold, but the board now is considering other options, including selling the St. Margaret Street facility.

"It would be an absolute travesty if Florence Crittenton had to shut down its program," Thomas said.

The community needs the program to support girls who are pregnant, educate them so that they'll be good mothers and prevent teen pregnancy in the future, she said.